


light of my world

by orphan_account



Category: Rick and Morty
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe, Bittersweet, Dark, Divorce, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/M, Falling In Love, Family Issues, Heartache, M/M, Multi, Out of Character, Regret, Self-Denial, Teen Pregnancy, Violence, this will hurt you
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-21
Updated: 2017-07-21
Packaged: 2018-12-05 04:03:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11569926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: dimension's H-208H morty reflects on his life through his hardest yet most meaningful years he had passed,and learns the true meaning of love and what it means





	light of my world

**Author's Note:**

> this is a part of a series of my own personal au i had for awhile.  
> beware of edginess,and lots of ooc and tears,so much tears and pain!

you are as pathetic as you think you are.

maybe if you weren't so fed up on your own misery maybe you could still find any way to express emotion with yourself that does not include you drinking yourself to death with poisonous liquid everyday.

but you have hope,and maybe that's all you need,having to hope of being wanted,of being loved,

_and you are loved..._

her name is Jessica and you find out that you like the way her name rolls on your tongue.

it's like a sweet candy when you take the sip of whiskey that stings your tongue,you still drink it,because you remember each time you take a gulp the way you met,

and each time the memory is sweeter than before.

it happened so long ago,you think.

back when you were just a poor little boy,that's how they called when they were out of reasons to mock and hate you.

the boy with an alcoholic mom and a dumbass of a dad,a neglecting sister,and a grandfather that only used you for hiss boredom.

your parents divorced when you were 14,so young and meek,and full of tears.

summer left with mommy,you were kept with daddy,and rick...

_rick didn't love you..._

_not enough anyway..._

 he opened a portal and went away...you were on your own.

your dad,he was a good man,he stood for your mother when she got pregnant,he stood there for you too.

but his heart was broken,and his selfishness took over.

for a year,you were just an empty shell,and people wouldn't understand,

that being alive and breathing,

**was.not.the.same.thing.**

 

your mother didn't see you,not because she couldn't,but because she didn't want to.

the shame,of being a failure of a mother,it hurt so much,more than you could ever understand.

_you secretly wondered,if she knew,that you didn't want to see her too..._

you were fifteen when you finally acknowledged her existence,the funny truth,she was always there,the high school's sweetheart Jessica,dating a douche who could barley care for her more than his ridicules ego.

at first you felt like a stalker,always checking her out,those round crystal eyes,her adorable unique hairstyle,her girlish laughter,her soft sweet beautiful-

 "can i help you?" she asks.

_can she?_

_will she?_

_of course she can,_

_**but will she?** _

"go out with me" you say,she blinks,she stares,she turns her head away trying to hide away the blush.

why is she so embarrassed? doesn't she know she's beautiful.

none the less she agrees,

_on Wednesday_

_at night,_

_alone,_

_so brad doesn't know..._

_-_

 

it went good,it went really good,she took you to the clubs,and you told her stories.

about spaces,and galaxies,of dimensions and monsters and aliens you told her about...

**_grandpas that leave their grandsons on their own and let them rot in their misery and sorrow,_ **

**_about mothers that felt too gross with themselves to see their sons when they needed them the most,_ **

**_about sisters that didn't care when their little brothers called them and cried themselves to sleep,_ **

**_about fathers that ignored their children that passed out in the garage because of alcohol poisoning,_ **

you told her all of that.

_she listens..._

_she learns..._

_she puts her head on your shoulder and cries..._

_for you..._

and for the first time in forever you feel...loved.

salvation never felt so fucking sweet before.

-

a year later,she gathers a pair of balls and breaks up with brad,he slaps her in front of everybody,so you grab him by the collar and punch his nose.

again and,

again and,

again.

no one will hurt her,you made this a promise.

-

a year later,you come back home,tired of work,you let yourself wander in the kitchen,dad was asleep,with a bottle of wine that were left behind.

you see her in the kitchen,sitting and crying,a plastic stick in her hand,she looks up and tells you everything.

"i'm pregnant!"  you pat her head,she tugs you closer.

 _everything will be okay,_ you say _,everything will be just fine..._

you studied hard,you worked harder,you had a great grades and a fine amount of money to support your pregnant girlfriend.

she god her share when she stole from her family when they kicked her out of the house when she refused to have an abortion.

she lived with you,it was okay,you had her,she had you.

_it's all you needed,you felt...loved._

 

the bullshit they told you,all the excuses and crap and lies,you heard it all before.

_"please try to understand me"_

_"it's for your own good son"_

_"stop being such a crybaby morty"_

_"grow the fuck up m-morty"_

 

you smile and light a cigarette,suddenly the universe felt like a joke...

-

a year later,you marry her,your darling,your light,your...Jessica.

a small ceremony,nothing special,nothing fancy,but it's still not disappoint you.

she was beautiful,in the strapless mermaid dress,even with a visible belly,she was still beautiful,and you always let her know that.

you both get yourself a nice apartment near by,she asks you about the money...

you don't tell her you got it from,getting into different dimensions by using rick's old inventions you found in the garage and that you assassinated every alien thug that threatened you on your way.

to your nineteen birthday you become a father.

little blossom and little Ricky...

they are beautiful,but they are also ugly.

you finally have a family,something that you thought you lost long time ago.

-

a year later you come back home,it's dusty and old,broken windows and open door.

you open the garage using a crowbar to your success,it works.

you expected it to work,but mother of god...you did not expect seeing rick at the garage.

he was as shocked as you,you were as shocked as him.

he looked like a mess...

he was a mess... 

"m-morty" he whispers,you look away.

why is he so shocked?

it's you,his grandson.

the one he abandoned because he didn't want him anymore,because he was a coward,a fool,a pebble in his shoe.

_why was he so shocked?_

"fuck morty,y-you *urp* you changed" 

"i did" then there is silence,it's awkward,but you don't care,he never did.

he grabs your hand and pulls out his portal gun.

"where is dad?" you want to pull your hand away,you want to punch him,slap him,kill him.

you want to hughimkisshimcrytohimandpleasehim-

"dead" he doesn't look at you,his breath smelled like alcohol,like always,like him.

"where is mom? where is summer?" no you don't care about those people,you just wanted to piss him off with these stupid questions.

"listen to me m-morty,listen to me *urp* good" he turned on the portal gun and you listen,you listened good.

"i can make it change,everything,there's a dimension i found that we could both fit in too,if you just let me-

that's enough,you heard enough.

you pull your hand,and leave the place,not bothering to look behind you.

because you don't need him,

you can't need him,

he's not yours,

he never was,

he never will be.

-

you're twenty one now,jessica got back to work,and she is happpy,your kids learnt to walk,to talk,to shit in a pot,you're happy.

_you are loved..._

you are loved when you wake up,

you are loved when your kiss your family goodbye,

you are loved when you at work,

you are loved in the pub,in the night,with a drink,with your tears.

you came home late,your wife was waiting,she's angry,she's worried,because she loved you,you piece of shit.

you cry and she...

watches,

and she learns,

and she puts her head on your shoulder,

and she let's you know.

"i love you" she says everyday,and each time it's sweeter than the bitterness in your life,

each time you love her more.

 

 

 

 


End file.
